Travel Deal Seeker Gifts

'I believe I'm entitled to a discount.'

"£300 A NIGHT?!? - How much is it just for a day..?"

"No, there was no 'Buy One, Get One Free.' You're twins."

Sale on the same stuff as last week.

'What do you do with the time you save?'

Shop struggles to sell books about recession: '90 per cent off on all credit crunch books' (Titles incluude: Beat the Crunch! Who's to Blame? We're all Doomed!)

(Visual gag) Wellard's annual BIG HANDBAG SALE!! A woman is dragging a huge bag out from a bag shop

"Wait a sec, I have a coupon around here somewhere."

"It's a 'Black eye friday'. I got it in a fight over a 56 inch TV."

"How soon will this be a remnant

"Cancel the trip. The cook didn't get a visa."

Excess Baggage: By the time the male of the species admits he is lost. It is generally too late.

"I want you to know that emotion overrode reason."

"I just..."

That's supposed to say garage sale!

"So, do you want balls that only go up, or ones that only go down?"

I thought you said Megson couldn't be bought.

"Al, you've been chosen Businessman of the Year by the Junior Chamber of Commerce."

Leave Nothing But Footprints, Take Nothing But Selfies.

"The economy's been worsening for a while, but people still don't feel it, Rudy." "...Which means we still have time to get in on the despair action." "Despair action"? "We're going to expand our menu. Add more comfort foods, more 'sale' items, debt consolidation loans..." "Nobody's dumb enough to get a debt consolidation loan from some random guy." "Ha ha hoo hoo hee-"

'Sorry, that was before the fed raised the interest rates.'

'We don't know what it is but it was in the sale so we thought we'd better get one before they sold out.'

"This is what happens when you award the contract to the cheapest tender...."

Airport Bored Rooms

"All it takes is a little marketing, Tia Carmen!"

"While you make the sales presentation, Monica. I'll scope out the room and try to identify this company's Achilles heel!"

Excess Baggage: Airline CEO's should be forced to work at the check-in counter explaining those hated add-on fees to passengers.

Online Shopping.

"I thought the travel agent said 40% off."

"Don't worry. If we're too late, we can always catch the secondary screening."

Holiday Sales: The Starting Line

'Can I ask you what you've had to eat this morning, Sir? . . .Have you evacuated your bowels since then? . . . I'm afraid I'll have to charge you for the additional weight.'

"Do kids eat free?"

Unusual Offers

"I think he said he wants to buy 'just the one'. You'd better fetch the manager"