Trainee Surgeon Prints

'So let this be a lesson to you Courtney, 'there's no people like showpeople!''

There's no such thing as a triple carburetor bypass!

'Okay, Mom. I'm sorry I re-gifted one of the kidneys you gave me.'

"I hope you don't mind - I'm training a brand-new assistant and I've asked her to check your blood pressure."

'Oh don't mind him - he's just a great big teddy bear.'

'Have you picked out a domain name, yet?'

'Wilkins! Keep your eyes on your own cadaver!'

"That's enough about the noggin and the schnoz. Let's move on to the tummy-wummy and the keister."

Writer Services: We fix plot holes.

Body Building

On board the MS Hepatology

'Oh for heaven's sake, Jim... all he wants to do is perform a vasectomy on you.'

'I was a junior doctor when I started this shift.'

Orthopedics. Pediatrics. Stuff they never taught your in nursing school.

DO IT YOURSELF - Four new jobs we'll all have to do ourselves

'Great. Another trainee lawyer.'

Surgeon to other: 'First organ transplant?'

"First of all, where and what is a prostrate?"

'Remember the NHS ethos; if it ain't broke, break it. Then make sure it can't be mended.'

"I've just performed a tonsillectomy on Daddy while he was asleep."

Manager reading The Little Trainee That Could: 'I think I can, I think I can...'

"Firstly, have you ever had an appendix out before?"

'No, Johnny - first you punch the airholes, and then you put in the hamster!'

NHS application system: 'Let me in! I'm a Junior Doctor!'

'Virtual patient.'

The shakedown escalates.

Igor leaves an I.O.U. after stealing a brain.

"I just ate my organ donor card."

STRIP Hambone: Training wheels on a computer

"Don't worry about a thing, I learned to do this in prison."

"It's not for soaking your feet. . . it's a bed pan."

"Sigh! No boating today." "For? Damn!" "Okay, prep her. Oh, and cancel my tee time." "How elective surgery really works."

'O.K. people, it's time to test our work...'

'That's how much time your HMO allots for bypass surgery.'

'He still hasn't got the hang of it.'