Traffic Enforcers Pillows

"Well Jenkins, as speedtraps go, it's certainly effective"

Please Drove Carefully.

Unpopular Street Signs: Road Work Behind, Speed Jump Ahead, Good Luck, Slow Distracted Adults.

Dog Crossing

'You don't have a license and registration, do you?'

'I'm lost, did you happen to see a lady without a boy like me ?'

No jay walking.

"No officer, I didn't what the speed limit was. Those signs were going by too fast."

Street signs you don't want to see.

'Do you know how fast you were going?'

"I don't care why you crossed the road! I do care however about "how" you crossed the road: without checking for cars first!"

One way only.

'Never, Ever...drive 56 mph on a 55 mph freeway in a sporty red convertible.'

'Caution Speed Bump Ahead.'

Car leaving highway crashes through 'EXIT HERE' sign.

Family traits.

"For pity's sake, George - stop tooting and ask for directions!"

'Mom! Do they have traffic lights and stop signs in the sky?'

Los Angeles' New Smart Meters

"I told you we'd be better off taking Canal."

'I thought forty is the new thirty.'

"I've had. . . um. . . just a small sherry. . ."

"It's a narrative I didn't intend."

"Sorry, eighty is not the new sixty-five."

'Have a heart, officer... the little mite is starving!'

"Oh look, that police car is chasing someone! Let me get out of his way. Hmm...he's still behind me. Let me move... That's odd....he's still behind me. I'll move over another lane."

"I've got a wall I need to get to, officer."

'Where's the circus, buddy?'

"Coffee...Cigarettes...Bubble gum..."

"Do you know why I pulled you over?"

'It's an idea whose time has come, Mr. Mayor -- 'drive-through traffic court'!'

"Being a crossing guard for a squirrel is exhausting!"

'It's an idea whose time has come, Mr. Mayor -- 'drive-through traffic court'!'

'This is just a routine check, sir - who did you vote for in the last election?'

"No, officer, I don' t know how fast I was driving. I had my head sticking out of the window."