Traffic Avoider T-Shirts

'I beat the 5 o'clock rush... I leave work at noon!'

"I hired a ride service that specializes in avoiding traffic. We should be there in about 30 minutes depending on the wind."

"Don't tell the boss, but I'm leaving early to beat the traffic."

Dog Crossing

Crowded Ice Fishing

No need to be concerned, madam! I'm wrapped in cotton wool!

Family traits.

The Forever Stamp

"You couldn't just stop and ask directions, could you?"

"Sorry, eighty is not the new sixty-five."

"Is there a problem officer?"

'Here are the safety manuals you wanted'

Merlin realizes too late that he shouldn't be hexing while driving.

Santa's a Traffic Reporter during his off season.

"It's great things are back to normal, except that there are people everywhere."

'Will you watch where you're going with that thing?'

Big bumpers.

'It's not flying I'm afraid of -- it's driving to the airport!'

D.I.Y ladder

"Great. Now we'll probably miss all the lights between here and earth."

Danger Signs.

"These self-honking cars make it so much easier to focus on driving."

"Always wondered what happened if you tried to drive through without a card."

Road signs.

'Been coming here for years and never bumped into anyone who knows me . . . weird!'

"I saw the guy who cut me off on the highway get pulled over by a police officer!"

"Gah! Too many people!"

"I spend so much time in traffic, I turned my car into a mobile office."

Less Desirable Half-Women Half-Fish

We moved to the sea to get away from the crowd, only to find they'd moved to the sea.

"What's the rush? He'll still be dead when you get there."

Ed makes his small but vital contribution to the world's daily crude production.

Ace Towing.

Abandon all hope,you who enter here.