Tourism Marketer Gifts

Tourism Bureau. We should stop describing our city as "the new hot spot."

The brochure did say to watch out for the bottom-feeding fish.

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

"I'm going to bombard you with graphs until you agree with me."

"And need I remind you, the 'art of the deal' is the lifeblood of this company."

"There's no such thing as 'bad publicity'." "All traffic is good traffic."

"These projections don't make sparkles shoot out my ass."

'It's only a hunch, but I think everybody bought everything they needed, last time.'

"So the plan is to fly everyone for free. But we'll charge $400.00 per bag."

"The leadership team wants a catchy acronym for a new social media app they're calling Functional Applied Relationship Tracker. Any suggestions?"

'I think you are taking this elevator pitch way too literally'.

"I'm afraid 'It's a surprise', doesn't cut it as a growth strategy."

"After years of cartoon rejections, Bill stooped to trying a little shameless product placement."

'How fast can you hype?'

'I should not that the cherry and whipped cream were an afterthought created by our graphics dept.'

'Our product flooded the market... Before backing up a deluge of consumer complaints!'

Two children are running lemonade stands outside their home; one stand is more popular than the other.

The Zoo.

The Vineyard

Apples for sale

'Someplace where we could take lots of selfies with national monuments...'

"Maybe now, we could look at customer care'?"

"And isn't it time we replaced the worn-out, meaningless cliches in our mission statement with some dazzlingly new meaningless cliches?"

Easter Island legs

'We want everyone to remember our name.'

"Now that I have everyone's attention..."

Invasion Of The Summer Aliens

"Hawaii, where are you folks going?"

Winter Coat Check at a Tropical Destination's Airport

"So, I see you have a background in advertising..."

Leaning Tower -After a bottle, Jean noticed the tower stopped leaning.

Beach con-man.

"Hmm...well...It'll look better when it's finished...!"

"I said I wanted to visit the Brandenburg Gate."

Airlines