Torch Whisperer Mugs

"What do you think? Would flaming marshmallows make good torches?"

Braiding a Horse's Tail

'Unbelievable: My cowboy expects me to drop everything and come running when he whistles...'

Speed Dating for Turtles

Sympathetic nursing will work wonders

Wolf Karaoke

"Now, why didn't I think of that?"

Dang! My shorts are riding up on me again!

"The robots have become self-aware and self-loathing. Now all they do is write novels."

A Girl and Her Horse

Hammer and chisel discussing what they've been doing, chisel says; 'Oh you know, getting into a few scrapes.'

Have you tried turning it off and on again?

'Can you loan me *** till pay day?'

'She seems to think I only have one thing on my mind.'

'Do I remember pre-decimal coinage?I remember pre-Tudor coinage!'

"Wheeeeeeeeeee!"

Ernesto Valverde Tejedor

'Bar-B-Q lit yet?'

"At first I was a bit worried about the comeback of wolves in Europe. But I must admit that they had adapted well to living together with humans!"

'I'm afraid this is going to lead to regulation of my invention.'

Two computers are having a conversation, but stop when their owner enters the room.

"Wow, listen to that: "Do you have a pioneer spirit? Wolves needed for reintroduction into European National Parks"..."

'Now, you've been naughty, you're in time out! I'll turn you over in five minutes!'

"Just badly sprained thank goodness... I was so scared it might be broken..."

"Did you see neighhhhhh...bours last night?"

Mister Oedipus.

"And if your teeth could hear you, Larry, what would you say to them?"

'Tell me more about your programmer.'

Ezra's purchase of an off-brand gps device meant he'd never get the chance to make his horse drink,

'You think you're better than me, don't you?'

"Well, I finally saw a shrink today."

-Psst! Back me in the 4:30! -Oh! -Surprised I can talk, huh? -No, surprised you think you can win!

'That's my husband, Brad. He's a dentist.'

'The computer can talk to terminals all over the country. Bentley thinks it's talking about him.'

Foreigner ready for the hunt