Tongue-in-cheek Economist Pillows

"The president wants me to stay on as unemployed."

No-Work Orange

"What do you think I can get for it on the blackboard market?"

"Gas. Regular. Premium. Super. You don’t want to know."

'Pretty strange term, market share, considering the whole object is not to.'

As long as there are husbands, we'll get our's money's worth!

"Actually, I used them as collateral for a loan."

'You raised the price of air to 50c!' 'Inflation.'

'Don't worry boss, it's probably archaic!'

"The fish - will it be the market price at the time of ordering, the time of eating or the time of paying?"

"No, it hasn't, but when the sky does fall your investments are going to do very, very, well.''

'Economic indicators are down, but cheer up! The history revisionists will turn this into 'the good old days'...'

Aliens - 'We heard stuff is cheap here.'

Trickledown economics

Office of economic forecasting.

Escaping Black Hole - '..But captain that's the pensions black hole there is no escape!'

'Today the stock market closed early so money managers could take time to stop and smell the profits.'

'It's the NEW Chinese Stock Market Report.'

'I feel I owe a lot to my country.' - 'So, you haven't paid your income tax again.'

'Oh dear. I seem to have put the decimal point in the wrong place again.'

'I suppose if we had some money we could buy sand from each other.'

'We buy and sell them.'

The average taxpayer will ultimately embrace the auto industry bailout. Hell, we sold em all that useless undercoating for all these years!

"The usual? Or will you be having our 'stimulus package'?"

Banker stepping into 'New image' in 'Savings and Loans' office

'What can we do to reduce our spending?'

"Hail to thee, blithe spirit!"

Grand Opening and Closing Down Sale simultaneously occurring.

"That man's a legend in this office. He has 100% accuracy in predicting the past."

Government Handouts.

Husband / Wife / On The Side

'Great! Thanks to the damn mortage crisis, we've got to live in a neighbourhood now where we wake up with yellow feet every second morning...'

'Someday, Son, all of this will be yo....!'