Tipster Prints

Tip responsibly

Harry, I've just had a tip!

I remember your lousy tip. Enjoy MY trickle-down theory.'

"You can have my doggie bag as a tip."

'I'm afraid you've failed the Turing test.'

"It's right here… Nov. 29th, 1981, at Elaine's… twelve percent."

"Do we need change? That's a $100 bill for a $53 check, Mr. Presumptuous."

'We have developed an APP we use to import ingredients from the Internet, merge them in the computer, and then download them into the distiller and then just bottle the output.'

'You're right, I did overtip. Well, we'll just stiff someone at the next place.'

'A packet o' crisps, and have one for yersel'.'

Our specials today include salad and dessert. Tip and service are NOT included.

"I'd say my favourite wine is the sixth one."

"This wasn't me, it was the bottle talking."

One shandy and two glasses of tap water please.

'Thanks, Sis, but I think it's my turn to leave the stealth tip.'

'This $10,000 bottle of Bordeaux is also a powerful solvent. It entirely dissolved my savings account.'

Tip Responsibly

"All our ingredients are ethically sourced, so feel free to leave the sh*ttiest tip you can possibly imagine."

'Owner's kid. Gets paid under the table.'

'Waiter, your tip's getting cold.'

'Would you like to start with a drink, a menu, or my gratuity.'

'I never get tipped!'

5-6 pm: Unhappy hour - mourn the loss of jobs to apps, bots, drones.

'Just give him the tip, Harold.'

'So, does your wrist-wearable wine analyzer have anything so say about that Burgundy, like how to get it out of silk?'

'Psssst... cop on other side of hill.'

"15%? We all tipped 20%"

'It's that waitress I always leave big tips to.'

"Thank you, sir. I see you're not hopelessly liberal."

'Switch me to the cheap stuff when I start talking with my W. C. Fields voice.'

"I prefer the cheap stuff."

'I told you the waiter would remember you gave him a 2 cent tip the last time.'

If serving staff wrote the fortune cookies.

Traditional ale,Traditional Drunk

"You know this is to solve your problems."