Tipping Gifts

"Do we need change? That's a $100 bill for a $53 check, Mr. Presumptuous."

"It's right here… Nov. 29th, 1981, at Elaine's… twelve percent."

"15%? We all tipped 20%"

"All our ingredients are ethically sourced, so feel free to leave the sh*ttiest tip you can possibly imagine."

"Isn't it enough we tip well? Must we also like him on Facebook and follow him on Twitter?"

'Wait! Let me get the tip.'

'I told you the waiter would remember you gave him a 2 cent tip the last time.'

I remember your lousy tip. Enjoy MY trickle-down theory.'

'You're right, I did overtip. Well, we'll just stiff someone at the next place.'

"No sir, that's not the bill total. That's the suggested gratuity."

'Thanks, Sis, but I think it's my turn to leave the stealth tip.'

Tip Responsibly

"It says 'Good fortune comes to those who tip generously'."

"We add an eighteen percent gratuity for parties of six or more."

"I recommend number five if you have only $20 so that you can still leave a tip."

'Hello Sir. I'm Jeff, and I'll be kissing your butt all evening in the hope of getting a decent tip.'

You have no experience eating lobster? Before I spend time showing you how, do you have experience tipping?

"Your Honor, Mr. Jones is a waiter and claims he thought the $75,000 in stolen bank funds were left for a tip."

Our specials today include salad and dessert. Tip and service are NOT included.

"I think I'll just leave a hate tip."

"This one goes out to the lovers who aren’t intimidated by my tip jar."

Thanks for the tip. Come again!

Tip responsibly

'You just give me a big tip, Madam.'

"Why, yes, I am 'still working on that.' You know what I'm not working on? Your gratuity!"

'Owner's kid. Gets paid under the table.'

"How much do you tip your genie?"

"How much do you think I should I tip myself?"

"It's a good idea to tip first. That way I know what level of service you expect."

'I never get tipped!'

"You can have my doggie bag as a tip."

'Just give him the tip, Harold.'

"Thank you, sir. I see you're not hopelessly liberal."

"Expect a generous gratuity on table 9...I hacked his tip calculator."

'You'll be asked to rate my service after the meal, so could you give me a little hint just how much you expect from me?'