Tiny Tv Buffs Gifts

'I dreamed the whole night through. With time out for commercial breaks.'

Television Readers.

"And now here's Cathie with the hypothetical portion of the news."

'Thank heavens! For a minute there I thought it was the news!'

'Our regular programs will not be seen tonight, because our Station Manager is in a 'Three Stooges' mood.'

'Do you realize that we're sitting in a prefabricated house, eating precooked dinners, and listening to Chris Matthews' opinions?'

Baby Screen Time

'You don't want weather? Not a problem! How about sports, or maybe a nice movie? We can do that! Just put that thing down and let's talk, OK?'

"Bill did the voice-over for this commercial."

Junk art/ food/ tv/ music/ amusements/ novels/ views/ life.

Weatherman: "Tonight's weather forecast is confusing, followed tomorrow by downright bewildering."

Homo Zapiens

Tunnel of TV

Talk shows are great. Listen shows are even better.

"Hey, wait a minute! Isn't that our TV cable?"

"If I were you, I wouldn't change the channel!"

'You should know better than to switch channels during a Garfield special.'

'It's funny really - when your father's home he hardly ever says a word!'

'Have you any idea just how little this is worth?'

"See, Honey, I told you that TV would fit in this room!"

'I know that other kids manage on ?5 pocket money - but their parents don't charge them to watch any television programme their parents don't happen to approve off!'

'She got all the soap opera channels at a discount -- it's some kind of 'frequent cryer' program.'

"China now says it will withdraw its opposition to the missile-defense shield if the F.B.I. builds it."

'I've been watching TV all my life. I was born cable ready.'

'Come on, you're telling me that you don't watch the Discovery Channel.'

CELEBRITY NEWS TEAM"Now here's Frank Sinatra with the weather."

"Arthur, the bird's gone and done it again."