Tiny Troublemaker Pillows

Playpen Jailbreak.

A young Don King

Children's Self-Help Books. How to Look for a Lost Toy Without Moving a Muscle. It IS Possible to Make a More Annoying Sound! Tying the Impossible Knot. Mom! MOM! Moooooom!

'Dear Santa, I want a super plasma intruder. One that blows fire and eats people and destroys citys!!!!! Jimmy. ps Have a merry Christmas!

'Talk about fun, Joey! I dialed a zillion numbers and talked to all kinds of people I couldn't even understand!'

'I just got off the phone with your teacher. Next time you tell her you're from a 'broken home' don't forget to mention who broke most of it!'

"I think you hair needs washing"

"Oh, I like coming to the dentists. It's the only place where people actually ask me to spit!"

Randall couldn't wait to see what else the 'Magic Trash Can' could make disappear.

"Have you been eating the paste again, Todd?"

"Send ME to bed early, will they?"

'Here comes your Daddy - Do you want me to do the talking?'

'What's the best kind of glue to fix a TV screen?'

'Don't look at me!'

'Coulda, woulda, and definitely shoulda.'

"He said his screen is frozen again."

'How am I going to get all this back in the tube?'

'The man was real nice about it. He gave me my ball back and even said you can expect a nice call from his lawyer.'

A Grade Two student explains why he is so eager to get back to school.

'Well if you're sick of seeing me here, and I'm sick of coming in here,let's call a truce!'

'Ooops. Wonder if I can claim El Nino caused a surge in water pressure?'

'He's the teacher's pet. She keeps him in a cage in the back of the class.'

'Sorry dad - it won't happen again,'

'Fine, I'll go to my room, but one day when I'm a famous artist you'll be telling this story as an amusing anecdote!'

"It's perfectly all right. I used to do the same sort of thing when I was a little boy."

..And if you unstick my hands from my nose, I promise I won't touch the super glue in my dad's toolbox ever again.

Gangster Babies

Whatever 'shenanigans' are, they must be long. Grandma says there's no end to mine!

'I couldn't put it down... I had peanut butter on my hands.'

'This is coming out of your allowance!'

'My Social Worker said SOCIETY is to blame for my loutish behaviour, which came as an enormous relief to me.'

'Why are you hiding in the closet?'

'I'd like an older brother, please.'

Bar: 'Don't bring your troubles in here...we don't want to hear about it!'

Whatever