Time Zone Jester Mugs

"When it's eternity here, it's still early morning on the West Coast."

"Is he talking yet? I was hoping he could help me with my new phone."

"Better bring me another cookie. The last one fell in the water."

"You wake up after 100 years and the first thing you do is check your phone?"

"I hate open-mike night."

"During our vacation my wife and I went to Paris while our suitcases went to Rome and Athens."

"I slept funny!"

"Turns out the mouth of a river isn't the part right under its nose."

"New York are at Lunch, Munich are at Coffee and Tokyo are at Lunch."

Cow Printer

This Junk Mail made from 75% Recycled Other Junk Mail.

"Oops! Sorry! Clocks forward, clocks back, immigration,migration. . . I never know whether I'm coming or going!"

'Tell the boss I'm leaving an hour early this afternoon, to make up for being an hour late this morning.'

"Sometimes I think the captain doesn't appreciate the seriousness of military maneuvers."

"The weatherman is always wrong. It'll probably end up being meteor showers."

Four Seasons Total Landscaping

I'd like to check my e-mail...

Computer cables as fire ladder.

'Liberia? I thought you told me to register her in Siberia.'

Common tactical errors made by novice computer chess players: putting the pieces directly in the disk drive.

"The reason why U.S. time is behind English time is because England was discovered first..."

The runner ducks ate all the snails from the garden and Jack was happy but then...

"One in four fleas is a leap flea."

'Well, they certainly caught you kipping!'

"So, tell me all about some tourists who were here last year. . ."

Toddler in the bed: a journey

"Walter's solution is to pump a lot of fresh air into the atmosphere."

The Was-I-Ever-Helped-By-A-Radio-Traffic -Report Show.

"I'm confused. Is this a late lunch or is it early dinner?"

Learn Russian in 2 Weeks!

"This party has no atmosphere."

West and East

Road Closed

Senator Giveth Yields to Senator Taketh Away!