Time Traveler Fan Gifts

"I'm not looking forward to my colonoscopy tomorrow so I rescheduled for yesterday."

"My older self travels back just to remind me to put the cap back on this pen?"

"Let's just say I have a pre-existing condition."

"Meet the scribe"

Historical memory is on life support.

'That's about it so far, Son.'

If time travel was invented in 1600 in England. I'm a fan of the bard. Let's see if he wants to take a journey through time. Globe Theater. Sounds fun! Let's go to 2020. It's a nice round number. Zazzz! Poof! That's weird. How did they know he was coming? And why does he need to leave this place? Apparently you can't be here, William. The sign says "No Shakespeare in the park this summer."

"We're following Carrot Top."

"So then, after I'd invented my time machine, I thought: why not go back and visit the good old days?"

The Missing Sock Returns

Second hand furniture.

E=mc2.

'Whoops! I think you've arrived a little too early for school today, Dad!'

Pinocchio's Second Realization

"Milk, butter, bread - all past the expiration date. either he just hadn't noticed before, or his time machine worked."

'I'd say it's six of one and one half doxen of the other.'

Einstein develops his theories that time is relative while ordering at a fast food restaurant.

"Damn. I took the Rip Van Nyquil."

"Please! No harmonizing during ululations!"

"Wait... what was it I came up here for?"

Sundial Time

Time for vacation, time for work.

Dr. Roo.

"About how if the dark ages never happened we'd be so much more technologically advanced by now."

"Early model of baggage claim"

"I'm going to prove that Math comes in handy later in life."

'You know what they say - 'Those who don't learn the lessons of history are doomed to go to summer school.''

Danger Slow Sand.

"I don't know who you are!"

'This new game isn't working out -- the ball keeps running away.'

"It seems like only yesterday that Dad told me I'll be an adult before I know it."

'I used to spring forward. Now all I can do is fall back.'

"This just in... the country has adopted a 24 hr military clock... ...details at 23."

"More quarters! For God's sake, more quarters!!"

'When I met him he was all bright and shiny - now he's a rust bucket.'