Tidy Home Appreciator T-Shirts

'You never compliment me when it's tidy so I figured you wouldn't notice when it's a tip!'

Happy Holidays from Sanitary Claus!

Ironing day.

"I'm cleaning a little already, because the cleaning lady will be here soon!"

Gary Basks in the glow of a fifteen-minute window with no empty cardboard boxes in the house.

"I spent the whole day cleaning the house. My cleaning lady comes tomorrow and I didn't want her seeing things like that!"

'It may not be your feng shui, but it's my feng shui.'

"You told Pastor Bob about my room, didn't you?"

Spring cleaning.

"Okay dad, I'll clean my room. . . you didn't have to make a federal case out of it!"

"My mom used to be an excellent housekeeper, but I put a stop to that."

'You never compliment me when it's tidy so I figured you wouldn't notice when it's a tip!'

The Movers - Decluttering

"Good afternoon. Feng-shui consultation bureau."

"Hey, what can I say? It's not Baltimore, but then what is?"

"This de-cluttering has gone too far dear."

'Never, Ever...open the glove compartment in your car.'

'The upside of being unproductive is it allows you to have a very neat desk.'

Good disciplinarian gaining respect vs. scary nutcase.

'My dad thinks I have a future in junk bonds.'

Home is where you hang the lights.

'Don't forget to wipe your feet.'

'In every office there's always someone who didn't get the message.'

And it stores easily under your bed...

Is clutter necessary?

"Tidy Tim."

"I'm not sure why our realtor recommended getting a home staging expert."

Objets D'Angst

While you're down there, Hon, see if we got the Belle Boudoir catalog.

"Anything you can do, I can do better...unless it's cleaning up your room!"

"How many times did I tell you? Don't put the outdated chargers in the drawer for broken headphones."

How to tell an Empty Nest.

Miniature removal van in miniature village

"Harry, I want a divorce. I've decided to de-clutter."

'Do something about this room, it's a real dump.'