Ticket Taker T-Shirts

'I didn't accuse you of being a stowaway - I merely asked to see your ticket...'

Bench clearing brawl, $5.

'Ignore it! It's just some of the local kids trying to get in for free.'

Ticket - At the Theatre in the Hay Market - The Authors Benefit Pasquin.

'Frank's last request was that he be cremated and that I never give up his season tickets.'

Hottest Tix in TownSpecial Mets promotion dates

Football Game Tickets. These seats are so far from the field we'll need a passport to get to them!

Teddy Bears Picnic - Tickets on sale here.

'Howard can't come to the phone now. He's standing by for a major concert announcement.'

Need tickets.

Stonehenge Ticket Office

Now Playing: Christmas ? The Ultimate feel-Good Musical!

The first recorded case of overbooking: Noah having to leave the Unicorns behind.

'Just a minute, officer. I found a loophole in this law book!'

"General, last night while we were here, encamped for concert tickets, the enemy encamped across the river for theatre tickets."

'Hold on to this ticket. Immediately after armageddon, there'll be a drawing for door prizes!'

"There are 45,000 people at the stadium but only 500 of them bought tickets...the other ones are security guards for our 250 million euro player!"

'Quicker to cycle anyway, mate...'

A electrically-powered man checks tickets on the bumper cars.

"Fifty yard line! I bet you thought it was a silly necklace..."

"Okay, forget the cookies. How about tickets? I've got a couple of good seats for sale to the Rangers' game."

You need to start formulating a plan to secure your financial future.

Solar Storm Expected!

"I'm a dynamic pricing consultant."

"So then the boss said - 'The way you've been playing lately, next week I'm putting you in a new position'."

'Oh my God, they took my World Cup tickets!!!'

"I've brought the wrong tickets...And I've come to the wrong show."

'Say, are you the elusive walleye from Big Bear lake?'

'If you're in short pants it's only 50p. Long pants £1.'

Welcome to Stupidity Night, Pay Full Price and Get In Free.

"I'll have a programme and sit on that."

'I wonder what that knocking noise is.'

'Mr. Evans, it's a speeding ticket. You can't plea insanity.'

'Two for Tomb Raider."

'We accept payment by cash, card or an arm and a leg.'