Ticker Tape Whisperer Pillows

Google stock IPO.

'Sometimes I worry that I basically wasted my 2's.'

"The way he stacks those blocks, I see repression, some hostility, and a lot of dissatisfaction with his place in society."

"Brilliant report, I can't tell where the facts and the fiction begins"

"Uh-Oh..."

'I think I must be ambidextrous. I can calculate interest with both sides of my brain.'

"The robots have become self-aware and self-loathing. Now all they do is write novels."

"I will now fend off questions from the audience."

Business cartoon showing sales declining so much that they bounce off the floor.

"I'm sorry, JB, we still haven't worked out how we did it."

"Sorry, but there aren't enough life jackets to go around."

Have you tried turning it off and on again?

'...and that is my philosophy.'

'Can you loan me *** till pay day?'

"He's from IT. All I did was tell him I thought he was doing a great job... and he fainted in shock!"

Man rotates profit chart so it shows growth not loss.

"And here is where we started putting profits before people."

Despite the economic downturn, sales are as good as ever.

"AXP 0.78, AIG 1.12, T 2.63. . ."

Perhaps we could get the Saatchis to pain a pretty picture.

Two computers are having a conversation, but stop when their owner enters the room.

Sales tied in knots

"What are you in for?"

"Look, the numbers don't lie."

Catastrophe Risk Insurance

'Unfortunately, we were a little off-target again this quarter.'

"Graphs are like EKGs, they show the health of a company."

Psychiatrist interview an irrational number

I can read this audit, but HOW should I read it...What is my MOTIVATION, how do I bring these figures to life,make them sing!... Colin often wondered whether accountancy had been the right career choice for him

'Tell me more about your programmer.'

"Actually, this is where there was a slight earth tremor."

"It's been a bit of a roller coaster year so far."

"Our sales have slumped so much, we now have a couch for them."

'Decoding is often 1, 14, 20, 9, 3, 12, 9, 13, 1, 3, 20, 9, 3.'

"We ran the numbers on how climate change will affect economic growth, but the numbers got so spooked they just kept running."