Thumb Detective Gifts

The day the cat realized it was dependent.

"Hey, the neighbors just installed a new wifi router."

Man in office, desk covered in computer equipment, uses floor for photos, desk pads etc.

'This duck call works too well.'

Elusive Shadow.

"Miss Jenkins, e-mail the housekeeper. Her telecommuting days are over"

'As far as we can tell, the system went down because someone stepped on a crack in the sidewalk.'

"Remember when, on the Internet, nobody knew who you were?"

"Our system's been cracked. How is that even possible?"

The Last Days of a Hydrangea

Jean, bring me everything we've got on gravity.

"Why is there an ad for Jay-Z in the New England Journal of Pediatric Medicine?!"

"Honey, check it out — giant porcupine tracks."

"...I have the oddest 'earliest memory' and I wanted to share it. It's just as wekkm I guess. Knowing some man secretly attended my first birthday party has caused me to question my parentage all these years....Especially since Mother Park made me promise not to tell Father that the potted plant was acually J. Edgar Hoover."

'Miscellaneous' and 'Non-Miscellaneous' trays

"I'm an atheist. I don't believe in programmers."

"We need to talk about procrastination."

"I noticed he had punched air holes in his desk. Now I'm afraid to open it."

"I did a quick search for my lost requirements documents and I found them right away, but how do I get rid of the ads now?"

The Sleep of Reason Produces Bureaucracy

'Go ahead and dig, you said! what are the odds there's a pipe right there, you said!'

"This is probably how they keep getting in."

"Don't let the organized desk fool you. I have no idea where my computer files are."

'Where's the duck?'

"You can use Dave's cubicle. He has Seasonal Affective Disorder and won't be using it this winter. Whoa! I guess I'm wrong. There he is, hibernating under the desk!"

'Type the following as fast as you can!'

'Holmes and Gardens' 'What's on'

"Perhaps you slept SLOWER than usual..."

Mystery vegetable growing in plot.

"And, as a child, …. Did you have a suspicious nature?"

'Cool! Thanks to our opposable thumbs, we can send SMS messages...'

"My real name's Killer. Fluffy is just my pen name."

"Don't text so fast! At this rate, you'll need your thumbs retread."

'Hang on! A good looking she-duck alone on lake doesn't seem right to me: It must be a decoy...'