Thrifty Stylist Gifts

'Oh, these? These are my recession chinos.'

"Is this to make me feel bad for not getting you that laptop?"

"They're on special offer so I got three times more than I could ever use for twice as much as I could afford!"

'I've never opened her up on the highway, but I get great mileage in the city!'

Your energy bill is enclosed. You might want to sit down.

'You raised the price of air to 50c!' 'Inflation.'

'Margaret, what are we doing on this cruise ship that we couldn't have done at home, cheaper?'

"I'm taking your advice and saving my money!"

'What can you get with a quarter?'

"I don't know...seems like budget cuts have gone pretty far this year."

"Let's start with a couple of glasses of water and if that goes well I'll order two coffees."

'Withdrawal symptoms.'

"Years of penny-pinching really paid off. The price of copper just went up again."

The Bargain Brand

"Is that neat whisky?"

Martin hated dining alone – but loved the savings.

"I've been told to go through all our expenses...cut out any fat, get rid of any costly perks!"

"We could have a Do-It-Yourself wedding! Your friends could do the cake and flowers, Uncle Jim could do the photos..."

How much would you take off for cash?

Cost cutting construction ideas that failed: using rhubarb instead of rebar in concrete.

'He's studying to go to university' - Student reading book; 'HOW TO LIVE ON NO MONEY'

'If the pound is worth so little, can I have a couple?'

"C'mere, space heater."

Here's eco club's green-prom tip sheet. Let's see. Wear vintage clothing. Buy locally grown corsage flowers. Use biodegradable cups and plates. Eco club. This is so obvious. How about the tough stuff? Ok. Who knows where to recycle gel pads from push-up bras? The place that takes the fake hair extensions?

Husband dismayed to get cold mutton for dinner again. Wife comments that someone must be economical on the housekeeping money she is given.

"There's no getting away from the numbers....only by forgetting holidays, giving up drink, the cinema, meals out and socialising...will we be able to afford any quality of life when we retire."

"Uh, Dad, I appreciate the 'walkin' around money,' but I need 'walkin' around New York City money.'"

"I don't need one, Gracie. My shopping list is very simple! Things I have a coupon for and things that are on sale!"

"Wow, they want $10,000!"

"I don't get it. Dad wants to cut the household budget? How do we do that?"

'Don't spend it all at once.'

'Any annuity we can afford wouldn't pay the MILK BILL!'

"Tia Carmen! We're at Plaza Mall...not Flaco's Flea Market!"

"Sergio, we don't have to spend so much money on health insurance."

"An ounce of prevention." "This way we don't need to raise as much."