Thrifty Strategist Pillows

'By tonight we'll finally be in the black. We don't have enough to pay the electric bill.'

"Is this to make me feel bad for not getting you that laptop?"

"We were able to retire 6 years early by canceling cable & eliminating anything fun."

"They're on special offer so I got three times more than I could ever use for twice as much as I could afford!"

'I've tried all night without potting a ball.' - 'Try taking away the wooden frame.'

"I haven't started playing the violin. I hide my vegetables in here!"

'I've never opened her up on the highway, but I get great mileage in the city!'

Fries and kids

'You raised the price of air to 50c!' 'Inflation.'

"I don't know...seems like budget cuts have gone pretty far this year."

'What can you get with a quarter?'

"I'm taking your advice and saving my money!"

'It works all the time: Light a candle and dinner comes to you...'

'Margaret, what are we doing on this cruise ship that we couldn't have done at home, cheaper?'

'Phone for help? Are you mad? Have you any idea how much it costs to use a mobile abroad?'

"Let's start with a couple of glasses of water and if that goes well I'll order two coffees."

'It's for the girl who's in a hurry.'

'For P.R. purposes, let's use the phrase, 'uncanny luck' rather than 'dumb luck'.'

'Withdrawal symptoms.'

"Years of penny-pinching really paid off. The price of copper just went up again."

The Bargain Brand

Martin hated dining alone – but loved the savings.

"We're making progress."

How much would you take off for cash?

"We could have a Do-It-Yourself wedding! Your friends could do the cake and flowers, Uncle Jim could do the photos..."

"I've been told to go through all our expenses...cut out any fat, get rid of any costly perks!"

Cost cutting construction ideas that failed: using rhubarb instead of rebar in concrete.

'He's studying to go to university' - Student reading book; 'HOW TO LIVE ON NO MONEY'

'If the pound is worth so little, can I have a couple?'

"He's not our founder. He just found us the most tax loopholes."

"C'mere, space heater."

"There's no getting away from the numbers....only by forgetting holidays, giving up drink, the cinema, meals out and socialising...will we be able to afford any quality of life when we retire."

"Uh, Dad, I appreciate the 'walkin' around money,' but I need 'walkin' around New York City money.'"

Husband dismayed to get cold mutton for dinner again. Wife comments that someone must be economical on the housekeeping money she is given.