Thriftiness Titan Gifts

"We were able to retire 6 years early by canceling cable & eliminating anything fun."

"Is this to make me feel bad for not getting you that laptop?"

"Can we do that again tomorrow night?"

"It looks like our house got sick and threw up the attic."

"It was terrifying experience being faced with that kind of compulsive, insane behaviour...I tell you it's positively the last time I put foot in the sales!"

Second hand furniture.

The dumpster code - find something, leave something.

Queen of Upcycling!

So I'm "cheap." It's a perfectly good word. And it aptly describes my interest in conserving resources. I suppose we could call you "thrifty." Heavens no! And waste two whole letters? I see we've only wasted one whole tea bag.

Thrift: have your arms and legs amputated, use a pillow for a bed!

Thrift: New way to eat eggs (avoid needless transport costs).

'If by 'great', you mean 'terrible', then yes, we have plenty of great beers for under $4.00 a six-pack.'

'We are entering an era of thrift, so in place of champagne and canapes, there will be a jumble sale.'

When Tia Carmen says... "I got it for a very good price!" it means...she stopped at a garage sale on the way home.

That's supposed to say garage sale!

"When I was young my parents couldn't afford to give me too much, too soon."

"I love these old decorations!"

"There's more inside."

Your energy bill is enclosed. You might want to sit down.

Limerick On A Grecian Urn

'You raised the price of air to 50c!' 'Inflation.'

The household cavalry

"I don't know...seems like budget cuts have gone pretty far this year."

"Billy's room gets cleaned for free! The cleaning service uses it to train employees how to clean a hazardous waste dump."

'Margaret, what are we doing on this cruise ship that we couldn't have done at home, cheaper?'

Gary Basks in the glow of a fifteen-minute window with no empty cardboard boxes in the house.

"I'm taking your advice and saving my money!"

"Bogeyman under your bed? Oh, no, sweetie, there's no room under there… unlike your closet."

Vintage Dresses: Your Frock Exchange

Crap others threw out

'None of the other things had instructions.'

"Enough with the garage sales, Harold."

"Let's start with a couple of glasses of water and if that goes well I'll order two coffees."

'Withdrawal symptoms.'

"Years of penny-pinching really paid off. The price of copper just went up again."