Thrift Pillows

'It took a six hour operation to remove this fiver from your fist.'

'Turn right at the first $4.09 unleaded, then a hang a left at $4.03 unleaded, and over the bridge, past the $4.01 unleaded...'

Daughter and extravegant mother

'The sick economy isn't why J.B.has cut back on spending. He always was a tightwad.'

Thrift: Sew your mouth shut before going to a restaurant.

Thrift: Have a face-lift, and keep the old face.

'I got where I am by economizing wherever possible. For example, I still make and receive my phone calls at the luncheonette downstairs.'

Thrift: Smoke stationary cars instead of cigarettes.

"I feel that just as as I think I can make ends meet, someone moves the ends!"

'It's rather unorthodox, but it appears the deposit refund on the empties will cover your first interest payment.'

"It looks like our house got sick and threw up the attic."

"It was terrifying experience being faced with that kind of compulsive, insane behaviour...I tell you it's positively the last time I put foot in the sales!"

Second hand furniture.

'If by 'great', you mean 'terrible', then yes, we have plenty of great beers for under $4.00 a six-pack.'

The dumpster code - find something, leave something.

Thrift: have your arms and legs amputated, use a pillow for a bed!

'That's what I thought, finances are tight: She's switched to no-name cat food...'

Queen of Upcycling!

Thrift: New way to eat eggs (avoid needless transport costs).

'We are entering an era of thrift, so in place of champagne and canapes, there will be a jumble sale.'

"I just..."

"I love these old decorations!"

When Tia Carmen says... "I got it for a very good price!" it means...she stopped at a garage sale on the way home.

That's supposed to say garage sale!

"I'm glad they want comedy... the budget is a joke."

"There's more inside."

'How effective is this new weight-loss regime?' 'We can guarantee you'll lose £50 at your signing on.'

Limerick On A Grecian Urn

"I need something that says, 'Let's party,' but in a fiscally responsible manner."

Vintage Dresses: Your Frock Exchange

World's cheapest car

"Enough with the garage sales, Harold."

'Withdrawal symptoms.'

'It's time for the annual wage review...' (Sign on the wall says 'Remember money isn't everything!')

Buy Back the Junk We Bought at Your Garage Sale