Thrift Shopping Enthusiast Pillows

'It's the best charity shop in the high street.'

Second hand furniture.

'That's what I thought, finances are tight: She's switched to no-name cat food...'

Thrift: New way to eat eggs (avoid needless transport costs).

Thrift: have your arms and legs amputated, use a pillow for a bed!

'If by 'great', you mean 'terrible', then yes, we have plenty of great beers for under $4.00 a six-pack.'

When Tia Carmen says... "I got it for a very good price!" it means...she stopped at a garage sale on the way home.

"I just..."

Limerick On A Grecian Urn

"I need something that says, 'Let's party,' but in a fiscally responsible manner."

'The sick economy isn't why J.B.has cut back on spending. He always was a tightwad.'

'Withdrawal symptoms.'

Buy Back the Junk We Bought at Your Garage Sale

'It took a six hour operation to remove this fiver from your fist.'

"Once again, how little did you pay for this room?"

"I think I found the perfect time of year to sell my old clothes!"

House sale.

Garage Sale (sign originally read 'Garbage' sale).

Sale on Three Piece Suits, $10, 300 Polyester.

Electricity Bills

'For Sale Used Only Once.'

"There's another one! Pull over!"

"I only drink on special occasions. Like when some body else is buying."

Extreme Yard Sale

Thrift: instead of 1 tap for hot water and 1 tap for cold, 1 tap for warm water.

Just Smoke and Mirrors - Gifts For the Easily Distracted.

Second hand store: 'LEFTOVERS AGAIN!'

What were you thinking when you bought this re-sale shop.

"Let's save this gift wrap. I'm sure we can use it again. Remind me not forget about using this next year."

Garage Sales Anonymous

Thrift: bathe fully dressed and wash your clothes at the same time

Customer: 'Do you have anything for the same price that doesn't cost so much?'

Budget Recliner

January Sales

"My sick friend owns a second-hand store...got any used get well cards in good condition?"