Thread Maestro Pillows

'It's good of you to go out of your way to show me what not to do, Mum.'

"I thought you were making a coffee table?"

'It seems to work, I couldn't afford a blackberry!'

'No, this metal stress can't be fixed with liberal doses of antidepressants.'

"Most people forget they've had amnesia."

'It's good of you to go out of your way to show me what not to do, Mum.'

Mail Pattern Baldness - A man with a bald patch in the form of a mailing envelope.

'There was a slight accident in shop class. I welded my braces together.'

'What does the internet have against my people?'

"We can't agree on a size."

Study more to pass more tests.

Concerto in DOS for Microsoft Windows.

KNITEO ERGO SUM!

Quilting Bee.

Elwood 'I Can Fix This Myself' McGrunzen

Amnesiac Deja View

Happy Birthday! I wasn't sure what sort of music you like...

Man reading 'Amnesia volume 1' while having a bookshelf full of 'Amnesia Volume 1'

'I play heavy metal.'

'Where are you going, I already locked out that pump.' - 'CARL'S on shift!'

Setbacks in the development of the rubber mallet.

'I know Pasteur didn't work under these conditions, but Pasteur didn't have fifty companies trying to steal his trade secrets.'

Santa carrying a sack full of mail

'Has anyone ever told you your tweets are Hemingwayesque?'

"Something has happened to the canary."

'My job is safe. This guy is a regular and he drinks to forget.'

"Now where did I park my car?"

'Did the mail come?'

Man sees box on street labeled Mail-Mail.

'We need to decide where to put what's left of your money. I suggest something short-term - like your memory.'

"Now that the kids and grandkids are grown I can get back to more erotic embroidery."

"Her memory's going-can I get it put right on the National Health?"

Baby driver

"I'll take 'Remembering things from more than 8 seconds ago' for $200, please."

"Maybe that isn't the way it happened, but that's the way it should have happened, and that's the way I'm going to remember it happened."