Thievery Enthusiasts Pillows

'I'm going downtown -- can I swipe you anything?'

Thrift: New way to eat eggs (avoid needless transport costs).

"I just..."

"I don't have my law degree yet but I've got an internship down in cell block 'D'."

OK! I promise that the questions will be easy!

"Don't editorialize."

"Number 2. Step forward please."

'Keep an eye on that one. He looks like a sketchy character to me.'

'If anybody here knows why these two should not be wed...'

'You know, this is a pretty dangerous line of work you're in...'

"I need something that says, 'Let's party,' but in a fiscally responsible manner."

'The police is looking for a teenager who reads books... I bet they'll never solve this case!'

'The sick economy isn't why J.B.has cut back on spending. He always was a tightwad.'

"They've solved the cause of death of Richard III."

"Take your time, sir. Tell me if you can see the thief."

'With the kind cooperation of the underworld, we present live, for the first time on TV, an actual holdup.'

Crap others threw out

"I started to think outside the box. Then I started to think outside the law."

Buy Back the Junk We Bought at Your Garage Sale

'It took a six hour operation to remove this fiver from your fist.'

Gangster's To-Do List

Ignorance of the Law

"The robber was about 5' 11"...."

A convict escaping during the press scrum

Electricity Bills

Exposed and imprisoned.

Washing line with robber outfit and swag bag hanging up to dry.

'What ever happened to that persnickety inspector?'

Bank Robbery Statistics

"Don't worry, honey. This is just for our murder podcast."

'Was Monty the culprit? Had he fixed a horse race? He couldn't remember.'

'You've not been involved with money laundering before have you Joe!'

'Have you found a precedent? Yes, you did the same crime in 1974.'

'Emotional blackmail.'

You know retail is in a bad way when...