Therapy Professional Gifts

Ok, the first challenge is to throw out all the cheap crap in the swag bag we just gave you.

"Behold the secret to happiness."

Monster Baseball. The team's continuing to have some problems this season. Jekyll is good one day and bad the next. Dracula only shows up for night games. The Mummy is always covered in bandages and on the injured list. And King Kong can't keep his mind on the game --- Whenever he sees a pretty woman, he climbs up into the stands after her! At least Frankenstein has been pitching great again, just like when he was young! Yeah, he has a completely new arm!

"My granddaughter's first words to me were 'OK, Boomer.' I have no idea what that even means."

"It seems my fear of death has been replaced by my fear of politics."

"Tell me about this fear of couches."

"Soul searching? Yes, you could call it that."

A female patient in an exam room sees a sign that reads, 'Break glass in case of physician burnout'

Kiosk in large lobby with sign above it labeled 'Empathy'.

"Everyone at Megadrug is committed to the benefits of spoken therapies, which is why we developed 'nitrazone' to enhance the experience."

"I don't think you're getting enough stress."

'The proliferation of bird watchers make me more and more self-conscious...'

'My name's Google and I'm being inundated with requests for information about every damn thing imaginable, by people I don't even know...It's endless!'

'Look, you can only do so much!'

"We have three house blends: 'One More Chance', 'Forget About It' or 'I'll See You In Fun Court'."

'The meaning of communinication is the response we get'

Licensed Therapist

"Sometimes ... I just want to run away."

Their marriage in jeopardy, Strawberry Shortcake and Billy Bob Banana Bread seek therapy.

"My emotional support dog ate my comfort food."

"Have you tried binge-watching a show together?"

Weekday Morning Hell Bingo

'You've got bats alright...now we'll just have to determine what kind.'

"I dunno, I guess I just don't believe in myself anymore."

"This is nice … let’s not hop again tomorrow."

"Before you chop off my head, don't you think we should see a counsellor?"

'I checked the database, Mrs. Nimitz. There's no such symptom.'

Bob had to confront his fear of butterflies.

'Take two tablets the moment you begin to feel indispensable.'

'If you were disturbed by any issues raised, please call your mum.'

"I bought it off the therapist who's helping me kick my compulsive shopping disorder."

"I invited a few friends over who think you should see a psychiatrist."

'Do you think it might be possible that what you wear could be a contributing factor to your relationship problems?'

"So, what brings you in today, Mr. Brooks? High anxiety again?"

What the Doctor Ordered