Therapy Group Regular Pillows

"We may be lost, but we can still have a purpose!"

"Hello, my name is Karl and I'm addicted to speaking to small groups of strangers."

"And last week I nearly crashed while reading on the freeway..."

"Did you honestly expect our couples therapist to know when Jacoby Ellsbury will be off the disabled list?!"

'Tell me about your feelings of alienation.'

'I hear you're quite an advocate of group therapy.'

'I told you he had a temper.'

"We never talk about anything. 'Me Tarzan, you Jane. Me Tarzan, you Jane.' That's all he ever says."

"I feel proud of the success I've made, thanks for all your support."

'I'm beset by self-doubt! BESET I TELL YOU!'

Latest support group: British actors who couldn't get a part in the Harry Potter films.

'And now Patrick will tell us how music has helped him with his problems.'

'Well, John, in the past two years you've gone from being extremely depressed to being basically unhappy like the rest of us. My work here is done.'

'No... you first.'

'Everytime I look at another man he hits the ceiling.'

"Have you tried jet skiing? - I've never seen an unhappy jet skier."

Group discount therapy.

"You think you've been kicked-around a lot? Try being me for a day..."

'Welcome to Narcissists Anonymous. Now before we get started let's talk about me for awhile.'

Breathe-aholics Anonymous: 'Hi, my name is Glen, and I've been clean and sober for over one minute.'

'Oh yeah! My self help group knows a lot more than your psychiatrist. First of all, there's a lot more of them.'

"Instead of national health care, we're going to try a little group therapy today...."

"You're not the first patient I've had who thinks he's a dog, Mr Buxton, so please, get up on the couch."

Insomniacs Anonymous - No Snoring

A meeting in which issues are resolved and a meeting.

'Last year I went to a chocoholics anonymous meeting twice...once to join and once to renew.'

'That's it... you're finally opening up.'

"It's nice to get out of the house and yell at my kids somewhere else for a change."

'I take it you've never been part of a pop-up psychology group.'

"Flash went off" support group

"Any chance of a longer couch?"

Group therapy for the socially retarded.

'Not much of a support group are they.'

'-and you hate sleeping alone-well,there's a coincidence!'

'Is your marriage okay?' - 'I wouldn't know. We're not talking.'