Theatre Night Pillows

"I'm going to pull a seat number from this fish bowl and someone will have a very memorable night at the theater."

Tonight - Ali Baba and the Forty Thieves.

Shepherd and eurydice

'He really wanted to get into the zombie role, so he became a Meth-Head actor.'

Benedict Cumberbatch

"Remind me: Is it the New York Critics Award or the Sundance Audience Prize that always lets us down?"

Shakespeare does stand-up comedy in the round.

Southwark Fair.

Pirate

Anthropologists discover the earliest known depiction of Jazz Hands.

"Smile when you say that, pardner."

Owing to a clerical error, Luciano Pavarotti receives kudus instead of kudos for his performance as the Duke of Mantua.

'Oh, it's a long, long time...From here to November...'

1847 - Bram Stoker, creator of Dracula was born in Dublin.

Piracy on a boating lake

"All our extras are ex-soccer players - they're the best at dramatically faking injuries."

'Okay, folks, that's a wrap!'

'I guess it's not much consolation but I thought your impersonation of the King was a riot.'

'But they told me to take her down to theatre...'

Modern Major General

"Bloody hell!"

Scarpia from Tosca

"Can you speak up: there's a bloody racket going on in the background."

"Boy, this blooper reel from 'Manchester by the Sea' is a crack-up."

The Mouse King appears in the Nutcracker

'Here's something that should suit your wooden acting style. How do you fancy playing the lead in Pinocchio?'

Silly wig.

Cafe Momus from La Boheme

"...You talking to me? Well, I'm the only one here... You talking to me?!" "Narcissus De Niro"

Applause

Canned laughter for sale in Theatrical Supplies shop.

Reginald Bunthorne

'I asked Will if he wrote it. He said he wasn't sure.'

No, this is the red lagoon, the black one is down the road a bit.

"Again, are you sure I didn't mention about bringing your own 3-D glasses?"