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"Aristophanes explains comedy"

Woman and pets with hair sticking straight up all enter Stress Management Clinic.

"Freudian, Jungian, Adlerian – none of it compares to retail therapy."

"But can't I be feared and loved?"

'I can't control my anger when people get too close to my kids...'

(When I'm good I'm very very good, but when I'm bad I'm... Well….) (Horrid?)

"Nobody ever asked about my mental health."

'So tell me why you think you're suffering from seasonal ineffective disorder.'

"An actor, you say? Guess you caught the acting-like-a-waiter bug."

Pet a Puppy

"If it appears that I only act like I'm working, it's because I minored in Theater."

"I've finally found a therapist who understands options."

"Have you ever thought of just knocking this 'half-empty glass' OFF the counter?"

The Physiciatrist...

'We never go anywhere together except here.'

Psychiatrist says: 'Oh, no! Not another fruit cake?'

"I'm an oldest child trapped in the body of a middle child."

'I hate all holidays!'

'Your wife says you act like a fool. I thought you said she never pays attention to you.'

'I guess it was a breakthrough - My free-floating anxiety crashed.'

Turmoil change.

"Compromise? What the hell is there between safe and out?"

"The damsels, the knights, I guess I'm just burnt out."

"Nd how did tht mke u feel?"

Bob began seeing his mother, who gave him up for adoption, professionally, three times a week. It didn't help much.

'I think I'm getting somewhere. On the way over I stopped to smell the flowers.'

'C'mon! Speed it up! I've got a bottle of wine here that says it's meant to be drunk soon!'

How to cope in Los Angeles vs. New York

Trilby - 'Oh my poor girl! my poor girl!'

"Returning to standard time is always difficult. I gain an hour of worrying."

The Imperfect Storm

'You have a fauxbia.'