Theater Technician Pillows

"The opening night is always a bit special!"

"Same story every morning - 'Can you come and fix our windmill?'..."

Stage Hand

Puppetry of the Penis

'Incredibly Inexpensive Sound Engineers. Pretty Good Sound Engineers, 12 the price, 23 the quality. You'll hardly notice the occasional feedback.'

Thespian Energy Powder (Fast Acting)

Men looking at black screen, "I call it film noir"

1599: Shakespeare's Agent knew what the public wanted

Working in the Hazard Zone!

The Witches Discover The Wok

Canned laughter for sale in Theatrical Supplies shop.

'It was great. I hated it.'

Dr. Frankenstein creates his newest monster, Frankenmime.

"Sorry, I meant to say "good luck", not "break a leg"..."

"I got the part, but I play a waiter."

"Because of illness, the role of Mimi in tonight's performance will be sung by a temp."

"Oh, you haven’t seen holiday drama ‘till you’ve met our little family."

'Your plasma screen TV needs a transfusion.'

TV stage door

"Well, you can't say they didn't warn us."

Casting Director

Best Special Effects Award

Henrik Ibsen

Fire starts at magic show while audience participant is left behind.

'I'm here in case one of the actors actually does break a leg.'

Mulvaney's Soliloquy

"Is there a dramaturge in the house?"

"The management asks that you not throw genetically engineered tomatoes. Use the ordinary ones if you must."

Romy Schneider

Too Much?

'To tweet or not to tweet...'

Theater Owner Who Refused To Convert To Digital Projection.

Curtain call

Actors' dispute.

'The magician? I don't know. He seems to have vanished into thin air.'