The 3 Stooges Aficionado Gifts

"Go ahead and eat her, she's a pain in the a**."

Books: The Wit and Wisdom of Ebenezer Scrooge

'Our regular programs will not be seen tonight, because our Station Manager is in a 'Three Stooges' mood.'

Editor.

'Sorry, we can't offer you a job but we would like to publish your CV.'

"You may not know this, but I've become quite the wine expert."

"Legal is concerned you made up your 'True Life' adventures."

'What a little beauty. Independent suspension, alloy wheels, metallic finish.'

'And a second degree in Australian studies.'

Literary Advice

The Moe Howard Installation

"Dear Author: Your novel is incomparably brilliant! Unfortunately, we aren't looking for incomparably brilliant novels at this time."

'It was owned by a little ol' lady who didn't drive it. She used a motor scooter on Saturdays.'

'This is the jewel in my collection. My invisible man figurine!'

"I'm enrolled in a total immersion wine class."

'I've been working on this novel since I was 10 years old.'

Karen of Bethlehem

"I knew it. All Shemp episodes."

"I think we'll put it out as a self-help guide."

"Regift the bicycle, Charles, but put this in my Panama pile."

"I'm trying to decide between a cocktail with a cute name and one that's blatantly sexual."

The rivalry between the Hamptons and Cape Code spills over.

Jonah's editor.

'Your proposed novel isn't quite right for us...but have you tried the trash bin down the street?'

'I wonder why we geeks don't get more women?'

Eskimo, Eskilarry, Eskicurly