Thanksgiving Giggler T-Shirts

"Seems like around November a lot of relatives don't make it to these."

Too Many Lawyers Spoil the Broth

'Oh man I've got a splitting headache.'

'This is one of our most recent vintages!'

'I started out washing dishes, but when the dishwater tasted better than the soup...'

"I feel like we are the polyester of dairy products."

"After the drugstore, I need you to find fresh parmesan."

Clown God

"I want some long, thin square ones - for chips..."

The Main Types of Cheese

'Nowadays we want all our food to be ethically sourced, Personally I'd be happy if it was all chocolated sauced,'

'I think I'll go home and eat'

"No thanks, I'm stuffed."

"The recipe said to let the chicken rest after it comes out of the oven!"

'Eight wiener dogs, and six rolls. It's just not right.'

"I've combined a laxative and alphabet soup. I call it 'Letter Rip!'"

'For a small extra charge, we can provide a specially-formulated digestive enzyme.'

'Wine, high octane grape juice.'

"Fresh pepper spray?"

'This place is really classy. They bring the microwave right to your table!'

Get on with it!

STRIP Hambone: Computer company job interview

"The chef recommends the tilapia. However, I really like the vodka."

'You'll find it has a bouquet reminiscent of cherries and chocolate, a silky texture and best of all, for me, a 72% gross margin.'

'To be honest I'm sick of truffles.'

Fancy a pint?

"Yes, he is a celebrity chef, but he doesn't have any opinions on Iraq."

"The special is… pine nut encrusted… filet of salmon… in a balsamic wine reduction."

Pizza with Extra Extra Cheese.

Looking at belt - "One more notch, room for desert."

'House wine?'

'He's wearing a toupee.'

"I think it's important to have a hobby outside of work...mine is eating chocolate."

'Where do you want to go for breakfast, fancy an Australian or do you want to nip over to Hawaii?'

"Fresh ground anti-depressants?"