Texting Troubleshooter Prints

"Damn autocorrect!"

"Nobody understands my texts."

"Ok, now can you read this text from my ex-wife? Because I'm scared to."

"Thou," not "you"! "Shalt," not "shallow"! "Sayeth," not "sawtooth"! Gah, I'm gonna smite somebody! God's Autocorrect.

If you want to text in tongues, you have to turn off autocorrect.

Yeah, same. I thought those emojis were just cute little dogs. The Boy Who Texted Wolf.

My wife doesn't understand my text messages.

Snow days are overrated. True that. Texting is impossible in mittens!

Ok, it's just rude to keep texting the coast guard while we're having a conversation.

'Sorree can't chat - got no credit.'

Oh, look! Jim's having a 'I texted a VERY important message to the wrong person' moment.'

"Bob sent me a message... 'Kx fwqt nijws...' What on Earth does that mean??"

"If I have to text you one more time...."

"Your husband used the wrong emoji to express his feelings, which caused mass confusion. He'll be sentenced to a mandatory emoji educational class."

"I shouldn't have sent them that poop emoji."

Pounding speeds up the computer.

'Human Error .. Yet Again.'

'I'm Jeremy's father. I'm a computer consultant and I'm unemployed.'

"Sorry, we've found an app that's better at being you than you!"

"The report is clear that cyber crime is on the increase, it's a worry."

"Now that's what I call customer service!"

'Sorry, suffering from burnout return in a week.'

"Nope, I still only have one bar."

"One of the advantages of working from home is the free tech support."

Bob invents a device that electrically shocks anyone who calls between 11 p.m. and 7 a.m.

"Did you remember to back up the last 4.5 billion years?"

"Remember, if I'm ever on life support unplug me... then plug me back in. See if that works."

"Does anyone know anything about spyware?"

Tossing computer into canyon.

Computer Expert

"My wife left me. Then my hard drive died."

Torn-Off Mouse.

"Tech-support has confirmed it. Screaming and hitting the computer won't solve the problem. You'll have to try something else."

'It's basically a good master's thesis, but the word you want is 'serfs,' not 'smurfs.''

'I think the mouse is playing-up again love.'