Temper Tracker T-Shirts

'Be careful. Mom's temper has jumped from category one to three and it's heading toward categories four and five.'

'It's only a hunch, but I think everybody bought everything they needed, last time.'

"A wet winter, but we're making the best of it."

Two women wearing identical dresses head toward exchange window at department store.

The interested bystanders.

'This is too small. Get me a 12...How many times?! I'm a 10 or a 12 on top and a 12 or 14 on the bottom depending on the shop, the cut of the fabric, the ambient air temperature, and the rotation of Pluto...and we always try the 10 first capiche?'

"Walking erect is very trendy now."

"As you can see, sales have been a little erratic lately..."

"I'm not telling you to stay. I'm talking to the stock market."

'ACE Heating and cooling' 'What's Hot' 'What Not'

"There's a lot of uncertainty out there these days. Or not. Who knows?"

Bureau to cut back on bureaucratic paperwork...

"Which way up do you want it?"

"Is this piece of artwork or a chart of current market trends?"

'Did I doze off for a couple of years? Since when did cupcakes become a big deal?'

Diet Books: Fiction/Non-Fiction

'We're looking for something that captures the zeitgeist of the nation...you know, the Great American Tweet.'

'I won't let global warming change my lifestyle.'

'Either play faster or get out the band.'

'First the good news.'

"Can you keep a secret, Fred? The truth is, I've never had a clue what curve it is I'm supposed to stay ahead of!"

"The economic modeling of our economic modeling suggests we need to remodel."

"At least we are consistently inconsistent."

Hipster Police Department

"Dear, it's the financial news. Seat belts fastened, seat backs in upright position."

"I'm looking for a nice basic piece of clothing that can fulfill every need I have."

'Today, in the stock market, 'irrational exuberance' was up, 'caution' was down.'

Propane Supply

'So there's global warming. What possible harm could it do?'

Wall street bull and bear hug.

"I need nothing and I want everything."

"You're dated look is an absolute tour de force."

"Will the current economic trend end in a whimper or a bang? For answers, let's turn to tonight's guests!"

Minnesota Weather.

The last of the mullet.