Television Ad Critics Pillows

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"Son, the world is full of disappointments. About 7.7 billion of them."

The Freedom of the Press is Worth Fighting For!

'We raised the price, so at least as far as we're concerned it's new and improved.'

The following is a paid political announcement.

'Side effects may include....'

Classic Autos: We have muscle cars for weaklings!

Your ad here!

CATCHY NAME

"And what would the, Truth-in-Advertising tribunal, want to speak to old Rudy about?"

"This bedtime story is brought to you by your good friends at the toy shop."

Overdose of election campaign ads on TV.

"You don't have to answer that."

Seatback in upright position, fasten safety belt, listen closely...prepare to be bombarded with promotional advertising through the rest of the flight!

"We upped the protein by simply factoring in the permissible level of insect parts."

Posters of the Sahara

"To be honest, it's the same stuff just in different bottles!"

'Of course he's an actor. When was the last time you saw a kid enjoy something that was good for him?'

'It's sadly ironic in a way - He can't hear the hearing aid commercials.'

"This is like the time you had me sell water as a 'diet drink'."

'I hate these commerical breaks!'

Adjusted sales pitch: 'Congratulations! You may already be a non-winner.'

"We've checked, and it's fine with women."

"Do you suffer from bald spots? Try 'Branches in a Can'!!"

Dodgy Marketing

"Why is that? Are you not confident that you'd be able to do it properly?"

"But your room does have a sea view, it's 43 miles over there behind the power station."

'But first... a word from Mount Sinai National Bank.'

'No, the nude scene isn't essential to the plot, but we need it for the posters.'

"Why can't David Blaine just stick himself somewhere and not involve he rest of us?"