Telephone Wizard Gifts

'If you are using a touchtone phone, press one if you want to talk to a representative, then enter your credit card number...'

Brian wanted to call the presentation "Synergy". Paula wanted to call it "Cooperation". They could never agree.

"He's taught himself work-life balance."

Olivia just hacked into the boy scouts' site and sold them 30,000 boxes of cookies.

'Can our software do that?'

"Where's the business end of this thing?"

'You don't have to explain the software to me. I wrote it while I was in the womb.'

'Anything you can compute I can compute better. I can compute anything better than you.'

"I don't believe I've missed a single sign since you made the switch to Power Point."

#Whyneighborsdon'tknowtheirneighbors

'Help! I'm wired and I can't get up!'

Oymoticons

'Calling Tech Support does NOT count as one of my wishes!'

"Mum! - T.S. Eliot - 'Humankind cannot bear much reality'."

"Whoever made Keir Starmer did a sound professional job."

"So, hw ws yr smmr?"

"The numbers don't lie . . . but we do."

'I bought him to retrieve my e-mails.'

Three businessmen using a pulley system to change a graph

"I'm trying to create a hologram of myself. If I'm successful, I'll never have to attend school, go to the dentist or go anywhere else that's boring again."

"Sorry, but I don't know how to tie a Reef Knot. Give me a simple project, like building a computer."

Man doing a search on a computer

'Yep,that's it Mr.White. And NOW go, Control-Alt-Delete, then re-enter.'

"I accidentally hit 3 keys and then hit enter. CTRL + Z didn't get rid of it. Can we keep it as a pet?"

If Disney was a software company

Counting part time employees is the new math.

Why do you need so many computers?

Man feeding his computer money.

"Baldo, why don't you turn that computer off and do something else?"

Aladdin conjures up a virtual genie.

Electronics: Nooks/Crannies

'Marmaduke! What did you do?!!?'

FRY's FAMILY - Young Tom was always fiddling around with bits of machinery.

'I think what we need now is someone called a computer programmer.'

Frankenstein's Monster's PC.