Teenager In The Family Pillows

'I don't know if there's a word for it, but it's the opposite of multitasking.'

"The new computer system has arrived, and Benny here is going to help us jump the technical hurdles."

Spot Check

"Well, I had 'the talk' with him.

'Well, Tommy, you've grown a foot since the last time I saw you!'

My Dad, trying to look young. The cap hides his bald spot and the sweatshirt hides his gut!

"Well, young man... just consider yourself grounded!"

"We’ve nailed guitar-solo-face. Time to try playing instruments."

It's a radical new development, a text novel for the text generation

"Check it out! In nature, females are in charge...they select their mates!"

'The school computers are six months old. How can I be expected to be competitive in the job market if I'm trained on obsolete equipment?'

'You know they've reached puberty when they're more interested in Dr. Ruth than Babe Ruth.'

“Dad, I think I’ve finally found Gsus.”

"I'll get up in negative five minutes."

'You can stick your filthy shell. I'm listening to the Arctic Monkeys.'

"I hate you! You don't understand me and you don't understand my software!"

"I don't need a lecture Dad, I know all I need to know from the online tutorials of @DamKing61, @HotDam72 and @DamEasy27. . ."

'Teens are like trees, you can chart their growth by the number of rings.'

'Since we're being so honest, perhaps I should mention that I liked you better as an egg.'

'I'm not doing well in Chemistry - I'm out of my element.'

"Today in class we're going to create a physics teacher."

'For God's sake give me some angst, how will I ever write a misery memoir?'

'Isn't it time you started thinking about cars instead of horsie rides?'

"Could you please downgrade this to a C? High expectations bring out the worst in my parents."

'Think about it guys: We're fed and sheltered, why would we ever think about leaving the nest?'

Modern Kids.

"Allowance?! Yeah, if you take out the trash, I'll allow you to keep living here."

'Oi son, you're not going out dressed like that.'

"My best friend is my phone."

"Would you mind adjusting the vibrate on your phone? There's a seismologist on TV claiming there's been an earthquake in our neighborhood."