Teenager At Heart Pillows

'She says she's old enough for a mountain of her own.'

'I have low self esteem... except when I'm arrogant.'

'Teenagers!'

My Dad, trying to look young. The cap hides his bald spot and the sweatshirt hides his gut!

"Well, young man... just consider yourself grounded!"

'Another football scholarship offer?'

A Punk Rocker Cocoon.

'Well, Tommy, you've grown a foot since the last time I saw you!'

"Well, I had 'the talk' with him.

'I'd explain how the TV, VCR, DVD, surround sound home entertainment system works...but I don't know.'

It's a radical new development, a text novel for the text generation

Mayhem, Inc. Part 21

"We’ve nailed guitar-solo-face. Time to try playing instruments."

Grand. Baby Grand. Toddler Grand. Teen Grand.

"Check it out! In nature, females are in charge...they select their mates!"

'The school computers are six months old. How can I be expected to be competitive in the job market if I'm trained on obsolete equipment?'

'Good night, Dear. Text me if you need anything.'

Perks Featured in Vacancy at Toy Company

Wow. Totaled. Teen Test Dummy.

“Dad, I think I’ve finally found Gsus.”

The Life and Times of Miley Cyrus

"I'll get up in negative five minutes."

"Young man, go to your room and stay there until your cerebral cortex matures."

"I hate you! You don't understand me and you don't understand my software!"

'You can stick your filthy shell. I'm listening to the Arctic Monkeys.'

'Since we're being so honest, perhaps I should mention that I liked you better as an egg.'

"I don't need a lecture Dad, I know all I need to know from the online tutorials of @DamKing61, @HotDam72 and @DamEasy27. . ."

'Teens are like trees, you can chart their growth by the number of rings.'

'I'm not doing well in Chemistry - I'm out of my element.'

"Today in class we're going to create a physics teacher."

"You weren't laid off...it's called Summer break."

'Think about it guys: We're fed and sheltered, why would we ever think about leaving the nest?'

'Isn't it time you started thinking about cars instead of horsie rides?'

"Could you please downgrade this to a C? High expectations bring out the worst in my parents."

'For God's sake give me some angst, how will I ever write a misery memoir?'