Teenage Hopeful Pillows

"Look dude, if you like a girl...you gotta move fast!"

'Another football scholarship offer?'

"When I grow up, I want to become president and eventually the subject of a groundbreaking, critically-acclaimed Broadway musical."

"Young man, go to your room and stay there until your cerebral cortex matures."

Reverse Ageing Laboratory

'My ultimate goal is to do product promo in a popular Super Bowl T.V ad.'

"Look before I leap - always. 'Think' before I leap - never!"

"Well, I've come this close to asking out Sylvia Sanchez. But I'm just an average guy! Nothing about me says 'I'm cool! Look at me!'"

'Push'n 50, but ya still got it!!'

'I'm trying to get my competence and my confidence in the same place.'

'Now then, Simpkins. What makes you think you could become a circus clown?'

"Another barnacle?!" "I was a teenage creature."

Our coaches are from top college teams. Questions. Why aren't you in training? Sports Camp. Rotator cuff injury. Concussion. Back surgery. Counselor. Ok, campers. Let's show them what you've got! Excellent health insurance card representation!

"I don't know...but it seems like nothing ever changes around here. It's like we've been 15 years old forever!"

Girl trying to be a woman

"I guess when you run out of Tooth Fairy teeth, you gotta go get a job!"

Child Testing Santa Claus's Generosity

'16 years old and I already have a company car!'

"So what's your definition of 'love'?"

I'm freaking out! Thursday is dress rehearsal. Nerves? Work! I've got a math and history test on Friday. Why did I ever sign up for the spring musical? Because it's fun? West Fester High School. On my college application it'll look like I had fun. It'll go with your "Looks aren't important" essay.

Hey, Twig! Ryan Beardsley wants your cell phone number! The divine wonder of West Fester High? Finally! My life changes for the better. He needs activities for his college apps and wants to come to our shortest eco-club cleanup. Change you can believe in. West Fester High School.

Man throwing a paper dart.

Who...what...why...when...where...whatever...

The Fountain of Youth.

'Young lady, you're not going anywhere until you clean your lint trap!'

"I'm playing Santa in the Christmas play. I need a pillow and eight tiny reindeer by Friday."

"Here's the problem, I grabbed the wrong map. This isn't the Fountain of Youth. This is the Fountain of Middle Age."

'Some of these young school leavers aren't remotely prepared for the realities of the modern work environment.'

"I think I'll be more relaxed once my secondary sex characteristics kick in."

"Well, if age is just a number, then I'd like thirty-two!"

'Hope you like the oversized furniture. It helps me feel young.'

"You know, we're not getting any younger...I mean, pretty soon, we'll both be 16."

Competitions.

I never feel a day over 25 until I try to act like one.

"It's all set. We both have enough credits to go to college."