Teen Chaos Pillows

"You're about to enter a semi-autonomous region of this house."

Rage.

My dad's doing flowers for a huge sweet 16 party. Everyone's invited except me! Who cares? It's probably some loser who couldn't get anyone to come over without going over the top. Thanks, Em! You know what's important. Plus! We'll figure out whose party it is and crash it! You're my spiritual guide.

Gotta babysit. Too bad! Tap tap. The worst part is the first! Subduing little monsters? Tap tap. No

'Teachers' Dreams.' 'Young man, either you remove your hand from under her sweater or I will remove it your arm.'

"Nicole, Kyle, would you guys burn my yearbook?"

'My Social Worker said SOCIETY is to blame for my loutish behaviour, which came as an enormous relief to me.'

'You'd better clear out some rooms, nurse. He jumped off a bridge, and all his friends are behind him.'

'I think I'm beginning to understand what sex is all about.'

'Mother knows best, Dear, so stop rolling your eyes.'

'Don't be silly mum, the morning after pill doesn't work 14 years after conception.'

"Can Hilary come out to abstain from having sex?"

"This zit is growing way out of control!"

"Dear Ask Sadie, My mom is always nagging me to clean my room. I don't see why I should have to. I like it the way it is. I don't nag at her for having a clean room, because I know that's how she likes it. How can I get her to just let me be?" "Excellent question. The thing is, it's your mother's job to shape you into a respectable person." "If you think 'being you' includes being dirty, that means you're a dirty, slovenly filth-beast..." "...who will end up alone and miserable because no liv

Abandon all hope ye who enter here,

'If you think you're going to sit around here while I wait on you hand and big foot, think again young man.'

'Don't try and act cool by saying it's the blood of the undead, we both know it's acne.'

"That cross is not divine. It's a symbol of how out of control things can get when a teenager lies about how she got pregnant."

"This is the dumbest idea ever! I'm just gonna call Estella and ask her what's up."

Zit: Pus based life-form whose main habitat is the teenage face. Normally peaceable, but he can react violently if threatened.

"I kept dropping my phone and cracking the screen. So, my parents bought me a thicker cover."

The Teenage Mantra: You don't understand...

'Where did we go wrong...?'

"Look dude, if you like a girl...you gotta move fast!"

I've had "health," ok, dad? I know what "you know what" can lead to. STDs. AIDs. Emotional scars that can take years to heal. Umm�Anything else. What else is there?

Ryan Beardsley is a deadbeat. Why are you stuck on him? I'm not stuck. He leads the good life by sponging off the raise and avoiding work. I didn't know that! How cools that he's a man of leisure!

"Baldo, I'm sorry! Tia Carmen's friend Maria left this book here by accident. Silly me, I thought it was yours! Ha ha ha!"

"Of course your parents embarrass you. That's what parents are for."

"Woke up late this afternoon, I've got the teenage blues…"

'I don't have a bad attitude! I can't help it if everything sucks!'

'Sure he's cute, smart and athletic. But my parents would approve of him and that wouldn't work for me.'

"Did you hear? A bunch of girls went through our neighborhood last night shoe-polishing our cars."

That's when I decided why should I care

"How real is your fake ID?"

"My boss is always telling me what to do."