Technology Stocks Gifts

"For God sake, Murphy, ALL tech stocks go down once in a while!"

"You've got your corner office, so what more do you want?"

'The wheel was great, but what have you done for me lately?'

"Is this to make me feel bad for not getting you that laptop?"

Pounding speeds up the computer.

'You forget, I'm a blackbelt in powerpoint.'

"Welcome to the future"

The day the stock market went UP.

"There's no such thing as 'bad publicity'." "All traffic is good traffic."

"My email is down... talk to me."

The Anti-Agent

The Future: "Sorry, but I have to show you an ad now."

Lynching on social media

"I wonder if A.I. will inevitably become as tired and depressed as we are."

"My granddaughter's first words to me were 'OK, Boomer.' I have no idea what that even means."

"My older self travels back just to remind me to put the cap back on this pen?"

Robot Parts $5

'The check is in the email attachment.'

"This isn't exactly what I had in mind when I told you to go outside and play."

Robots search for people's personal information in the cloud.

'I remember when you used to look for answers using your astute powers of deduction.'

In the Guru District

'My penmanship has really improved since I got a laser printer.'

"Her first word was 'paparazzi'. "

"The good old days of eating the washing off the line are all gone methinks: The farmer has bought an electric dryer..."

"It's almost 5 o'clock! Where the hell is my vodka app?!"

Computer Room.

Polly txt speak

Bob encounters one of the bugs in the Jean Paul Sartre fan website.

"Actually, she's just a figurehead boss. Our real CEO is an algorithm floating around somewhere in the cloud!"

Jack of all trades

"Is he talking yet? I was hoping he could help me with my new phone."

The Computer Bore

"If a stock falls in the market, and it had no investors, does it really lose its value?"

"Greetings, I'm the bluebird of dank memes."