Technology Researcher Gifts

Facial Recognition

A world choked with people mindlessly on the move

Spying Smart TV

"This will be its sternest test."

"Ya know, 'DUH' can be a very hurtful word."

"Do you want to play doctorate?"

The Jeopardy of Progress

Pounding speeds up the computer.

'... And some primitive cultures, believed that 'the great ones' modelled us from clay.'

Enhanced Pedophilia Interrogation Techniques

"I wonder if A.I. will inevitably become as tired and depressed as we are."

"My older self travels back just to remind me to put the cap back on this pen?"

Robots search for people's personal information in the cloud.

'I remember when you used to look for answers using your astute powers of deduction.'

2021

'Dr.Sall Thompson got so excited over the new spring design she took a quantum leap!'

Circa 1928, The Reese's Candy laboratory.

Valuable business advice from some famous disruptive technologies.

"Finally, after years of work, irrefutable proof that I'm a nerd."

Fear/Knowledge

Though he created more than 300 products from peanuts, George Washington Carver was unable to change even one of them back into a peanut.

"Would you like me to annotate that for you?"

UK/US Free Trade Deal

"No, I didn't steal your content. I just have your content's doppleganger."

Typical Brain Versus Einstein's Brain

"We're bringing the arts and sciences together here by giving crayons to mice."

'According to our statistics department, 78.93 of the statistics they produce are worthless.'

"Technology isn't making me smarter. It's allowing me to be dumb, faster."

"She's done it! The formula for work-life balance!"

Wally Begins research for his thesis entitled "who's a good dog?"

"Finches, don't look now, but there's a creepy guy staring at our beaks."

"You're going to have to submit to peer review eventually, Bradshaw!"

Molecular Biology and Cosmology buildings

'So...you THINK you have what it takes to be a scientist...?'

"Not only pharmaceuticals - we're also finding all sorts of industrial chemicals here."