Techie Hat Fan T-Shirts

'Yes, it has speakers in the earflaps. I believe the makers are trying to appeal to the youth market.'

"Fill out an application? Can't I just text it?"

Time Machine Collision

"That? It's where I keep all my passwords."

Drive in movies.

My url is: http:/how:/um:/powwow.co.chiese.html.

"We've run all the technical stuff and found the cause of the funny sound coming from your computer."

'Yes, our phones have WIRES attached to them! We're no free-range blabbermouths in this household!'

"Barbara, will you check your texts for a ring emoji?"

'Hey...here's a hot prospect...likes catching frisbees, chasing squirrels, rolling in smelly stuff...'

"Fit watch say me need more steps."

"It appears you have a virus."

'My laptop's being repaired and I felt lost without a screensaver to stare at.'

'And of course if you'e feeling patriotic today, we have here a new line of PCs produced by the federal government.'

'Yeah, but if it's NOT a mirage, maybe we can find Mapquest on it!'

The Woman Who Could Talk to Engineers...

"I asked my investment advisor for something that was low cost, easy to manage, and also functions on its own. He suggested an index fund or a robo vac."

Smile you're on camera! You're also on my podcast!

"First gig in a while?"

When beavers dream.

Sugar Machine

'Uh-oh. They're bringing in the closer to secure the win.'

Future Nostalgia

'Say, how can I convert this FAT file into a nice and small JPG?'

'I have to hang up now. I'm getting some static on another line.'

"I now offer DVR service for clients for want to see their future later."

Escalator joust.

"Everyone here is bonding over pictures of their dogs."

'Maybe we should get into high-tech.'

Antiques.

Modern day smoke signals.

"But I'm hot on the trail of my Google doppelgänger."

"Why did the chicken cross the road? It was wearing a Fitbit?"

Note to self: Learn how to use Dictaphone!

'I invented them yesterday and Junior already has them souped up.'