Tech-savvy Wordsmith Pillows

The Ebookmobile

"That may not be the best option for printing out your novel."

Reading my Critics

To no ones surprise, they ran head-on into one another. (All couples are wearing teachers reading 'I'm with Stupid'.)

"And to my nephew, Todd, I leave my 27 Twitter followers."

My other car has a bumper sticker that says this on it too.

Shakespeare loved a grammar joke

"I've grown numb to exclamation points."

I said, your bones ache because you’re old. I’m referring you to an archaeologist.

'Did you really mean both me and a hippopotamus evolved from a tiny blob in the ocean?'

'Sorry, but we're not compatible, Jim. You keep a diary, and I blog on the Internet.'

Best Seller

'There's no delete key. You have to use the board eraser.'

'To err is human... but to forgive is against company policy!'

"Remorse sits in my stomach like a piece of stale bread. How does that sound?"

"He belongs to a lawyer."

I've always been slower than computers...

'No Jenkins! I said we need to start using the Cloud! The C-L-O-U-D!'

"That guys is stealing my data!"

Sharp Eyes

Writing the poem was easy: there are lots of words rhyming with "snow"...

"If he doesn't go nuts first, he'll be the first person to ever write a novel on a cell phone."

Dear Author: We really are tickled by your persistence. Sincerely, The Editors.

A Poet

'He never listened to his mother!'

What if retail stores behaved like websites?

You trip on it, you buy it.

"What's 'ET' short for. . . ?"

"I got into the coffee for the wordplay."

"I'm the writer-in-residence."

'Universal remote, my eye!'