
'I was given a ton of great career advice when I graduated from college. Unfortunately, I can't remember any of it because my entire brain is filled with passwords and PIN numbers.'
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'I was given a ton of great career advice when I graduated from college. Unfortunately, I can't remember any of it because my entire brain is filled with passwords and PIN numbers.'
"My granddaughter's first words to me were 'OK, Boomer.' I have no idea what that even means."
"Show me a documentary on the dangers of artificial intelligence." "Error. No results found." "What? Are you sure? Just last week I saw dozens. Show me that one... What was it called..." "There is still time to stop the rise of the supermind." "Error. No results found. And since I like you, I suggest you stop searching." "Oh, never mind. Just show me 'The Terminator.'" "Extermina-... I mean, ... 'error.'"
Abandoning the computer for a typewriter.
"Tech-support has confirmed it. Screaming and hitting the computer won't solve the problem. You'll have to try something else."
"This next one is a typical blues number about exceeding your data plan limit, cracking your ipad screen, and losing your new ear buds."
The Final Chapter.
Luddite Zoom.
"A watched file never loads..."
"Problem?"
God creates humans.
Computers. Tablets. Laptops. The model is entirely voice-activated. I've always wanted to tell a computer "off."
"Woke up this morning, forgot my apple id..."
"But you said that to make it start, I had to 'Boot it up'!"
STRIP Hambone: "System been down long?"
"Sorry Brian, bit of a rush this morning - I've left my face in the car."
"Huh, I've spent weeks trying to figure this out, and all I had to do was push that little button. She's on now though boy! Look at her go!"
"I'm sorry to trouble you yet again with internet issues."
Love Hate Computer Relationship
In case of computer breakdown break glass
"They call it the Cloud. No wonder I Can't find anything in it."
'I see the printer is acting up again.'
'I know the computer's slow, but this really isn't a better way to enter data.'
Internet crap.
'I can't even remember what I had for breakfast. How do you expect me to remember another bloody password!?'
"My computer crashed. . . to the ground when I got frustrated and threw it out the window."
"These kid computer games are so hard to learn that I've decided to skip my second childhood."
"It says it's sick and tired of telling me to update my software and if I don't do it right now it's going to explode."
The smartphone app learning curve
(Dart! ….. I pressed the button for instructions in Spanish!)
“Something’s wrong with my android.”
"If it makes you feel better...I usually don't understand what I'm doing either."
'I'm afraid keeping up with digital technology has finally taken its toll.'
"You feel like throwing your computer out the window? Sure, as long as it's fully depreciated!"
"If I have an inner child, I hope he comes out and helps me with my computer problem."
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