Tech-challenged Humor Lover Pillows

"Dad, at your age everyone makes y2k errors"

Super Strength, Impervious to Bullets And Explosions

"COUGH! COUGH! Years of data mining have left me with data lung. Don't be like your old man - go into modeling or visualization!"

'...And, from what I understand, they don't have any hard drive at all.'

"There is a 5 month slow down. You are still on the fastest route. You will arrive next year."

"Basically it makes the same mistakes we've always made - but it makes tham so much faster!"

'Kumor's responsible for all the computer passwords, so the boss had him encrypted.'

"I didn't know they made a 'Sitbit'"

'Ok, give me your username & password one more time.'

"I think retrieving the info from that harddrive might be a little tricky."

"Hackers, Sire! They've broken through our firewall."

Washroom Doors: Men, Women, Computer Whiz.

AI Summit

"I wish you'd stop obsessively checking your feed!"

B2B.Com Pay Per View.

'By putting all our data into code, our competitors can't read it, our unathorized personnel can't read it, and I'm afraid, neither can we.'

"The are 10 types of people in the world - those who understand binary and those who don't."

'Dad, somehow I got into the IRS files.'

'You are not haunted by the voices of the dead - You are tuned to four extra.'

"Have you tried turning it off and on again?"

STRIP Hambone: Using Tippex on a monitor

'I'm sorry, but we are after a different kind of Web expert...'

STRIP Hambone: 'Can't you programme this thing to laugh at my jokes?'

"This tone means the battery is low. This one means you've just driven over a pedestrian. And this one indicates that someone sitting near you in a coffee shop is about to grab your phone and stuff it down your throat!"

'The number 1 dinner is available in an updated version 1.1.'

"Maybe it's just playing dead."

"Mine has a terrible battery life."

"You've got to compress it because my email account is limited to 3MB."

"Do I use Google Maps driving or walking directions?"

"No, it isn't a mobile. It's my pipe."

'Don't disturb your father when he's in stand-by mode.'

"His last wish was that we delete his browsing history."

"We programmed it to behave exactly like a human... it never stops complaining."