Tech Baffled Gifts

'I can't even remember what I had for breakfast. How do you expect me to remember another bloody password!?'

"My granddaughter's first words to me were 'OK, Boomer.' I have no idea what that even means."

"I need a deeper access to his brain. Only google has the records."

"That recruitment algorithm we’ve been using, I think we need to revisit it!"

I.T. Fear

March Against Big Tech: "Oh, wow, this has bee great for my step count!"

'Tech stocks dropped on the finding that technology isn't neccessarily the best solution to everything.'

"And may I now introduce Professor Muckenspucker, who is an authority on artificial stupidity."

"Of course, if they ever start to suspect all their TVs are watching them back, we may have problems."

Computer Class.

The fate that awaits us all: creeping Rooneyism

GPS can still have a few bugs in the system.

Privacy

"We need to rethink our strategy of hoping the Internet will just go away."

How Grandma Sees the Remote

"Grandpa's not tech savvy. If I want to unfriend someone, I say, 'I don't like you anymore' to their face."

Big Brother.

"Tarzan no want computer."

"You can't believe everything the Russian bots tell you."

The Final Chapter.

Diner is served

"To 'click to enter' or not to 'click to enter'… that is the question."

"I need a pitchfork that's just a pitchfork."

'Why worry about intrusive electronic surveillance. If you've done nothing wrong, you should have nothing to hide!'

'Here's a picture of my mom before Photoshop!'

'Sir, we need to upgrade our technology. We've used up our last roll of ticker tape.'

"I know it seems cruel, but it's the only way for him to get rid of that silly technophobia."

"If the jumper cables don't work, I'll pour more motor oil on the keys."

"Other than going ahead and back an hour at daylight savings, professor, can your time machine travel to any other period in time?"

"The doctor wants you to point to where it hurts."

"I'm sure he is a good guide dog, but there is such a thing as a GPS."