Teasing Aficionado T-Shirts

"The following program is intended for mature viewers. So, Ed, you should leave the room now."

Boss Impressionist.

'Quit referring to me as a Low Rider.'

"Call me?"

"I'm just saying. This would be even MORE romantic if we couldn't see in the dark."

Sitting in a tree

"I love you in a suit. You look so... employed."

'Ha! Ha! The Wooin' O't!'

Valentine Day

Mantis Love

"I'll be honest with you, I've been around the block a few times."

"Most women find me too cutthroat."

Where 'Turkey Bacon" Comes From

Love Birds love just being together

"Sorry I'm late: my parents insisted I wear protection on our first date, so I stopped to buy a flea-collar..."

"Stupid – yet irresistible."

'The mask?... Oh, I always try to obscure my face a little, at parties. Just to give the other guys a fighting chance.'

Today, proud and accomplished the career woman re-enters the dating world, ready at last to meet the man of her dreams. . .

That endless instant between initial eye contact and conscious recognition.

Love in Boom

Banana Smoothie

You just keep giving.

"Wow, you look sexy today."

"Since my divorce I thought I'd never laugh again. Then I noticed your toupee."

Woman and a Mexican hat.

'Don't get me wrong. I like the hugs, but I could really use a kiss once in a while.'

'The gentleman at the end of the bar would like to buy you an aphrodisiac.'

Sex Section in the Library

"Wanna get pigeon holed?"

'You're a filthy pig, Gordon! I guess that's why I love you so much.'

"Oh Darling, you're spoiling me! I've never tried tropical fish!"

'He's not getting lucky tonight. He smells too good.'

'Your place or mine? Both. You go to your place and I'll go to mine!'

Inappropriate horse whispering.

'I even love the way you snore!'