Team Sport Devotee Pillows

Hockey Season.

"Do you do temporary ones that last about two weeks?"

7 can't-miss prayers to insure that your team wins.

'You bought an F-14 equipped with an internal 20 mm vulcan gatling-type paintball gun? I think you might be taking this paintball thing a little too seriously!'

It had been a while, but he had finally come home.

"Why T-Rexes do not play volleyball..."

'Frank's last request was that he be cremated and that I never give up his season tickets.'

'This paintball war has really spun out of control.'

'I Marianne, promise to see all of your games in sickness or in health, for richer or poorer until death do I watch.'

"Edgar isn't here. He's working out with the Dallas Cowboys."

Football Delivery

"These guys stink. They're the worst team I've ever seen! What a bunch of losers!"

So you're wearing a bag over your head because you're ashamed of your team?' 'It's a cloaking device.'

"I got knocked down while jogging in heavy traffic."

'That, and my head is shaped like one.'

"I'm against pain killers for players, but I'm for them for supporters."

"As fans we are smart enough to understand the game, but not smart enough to realize how unimportant it really is."

"Should we have dinner now, or are you watching in real time?"

"Hey -- if you ever want to talk about this no hitter, I'm here."

"She's a little overworked but, depending on what happens next Sunday, I'll probably jump back on."

'Nothing like the sound of leather on wood, eh? Eh?'

"Sometimes I question his priorities."

Rudy Giuliani's shrine

"So. . . no, you are not going to root for another team."

"We're playing soccer, not football!"

'D'ya wanna wait until it thaws to see if it drops in the hole.'

"I checked out how much it would be for hockey, and guess what? The kids are playing pickleball this year!"

'Yeah - baseball, football and hockey...got concussions in all of them.'

"You're still in here? Go home. We lost."

"Well, some of us were synchronized."

Russel could always spot his mother in the crowd.

'Where did we get this new goalie?'