Team Loyalty Ambassador Pillows

NFL is jerk to fans

I like the Jets...I guess

Others will fight for you

"As a friend, I pray you rest in peace. As a dog, I really want to dig you up."

'Your master isn't due for release until the first of the month.'

"I'm not angry, but in the future I’d prefer it if you chewed up her Sue Graftons, not my P.G. Wodehouses."

"And now, since our local teams really stink, here are scores for actual good teams around the country that you might want to root for."

'Don't worry, Alice. I won't leave you.'

"Who do you like in the super bowl?"

"You can always count on me."

'My long-range goal is to turn pro and lead the league in product endorsements.'

"...And don't give me that 'I hope his precious little Blackhawks lose' look either!"

Welcome to Teamville, Population: 7 ... great people to work with.

"I'm supposed to be loyal, relieve stress, be 'Man's best friend'...I don't need this kind of pressure!"

a new hire signing a loyalty oath

We're so pleased with your twenty years work, we've decided to offer you a two year short term contract.

"These guys stink. They're the worst team I've ever seen! What a bunch of losers!"

"All the way from the new home in Rye just so she can sniff our old doorman."

"I don’t know what it is, but every time the Bruins win, I love you more and more!"

'Mr. Bigmeister likes to start each meeting with the pledge of allegiance.'

"Must that dog follow you everywhere?"

Replica Football Merchandise

'I want someone who'll not just take the firms line, but the hook and sinker, too.'

Ball and Chain

'Don't look at me like that! I know it's a banned substance, OK? But how can I compete if I'm the only one in the league not using spinach?!'

'Kaplan, you've been traded. ...Sorry about the tattoos.'

'What do you mean foul? I had a shower this morning!'

Welcome to our team.

"Yeah you've always been loyal, so what? You're fired."

"I hear you're the expert on loyalty."

"So. . . no, you are not going to root for another team."

"She's a little overworked but, depending on what happens next Sunday, I'll probably jump back on."

'That's 12 games in a row. As my best friend, it wouldn't kill you to let me win one every once in awhile.'

'OK, Mr. Altruism, real fast, name three selling points of loyalty that don't involve food.'

Punch Card: 'The next divorce is on me.'