Teaching Aficionado T-Shirts

'It's true that each week you give 100% to your teaching, but you're giving it 20% per day.'

Death of a salesman.

"If you wish to see your artwork displayed, don't forget your bio."

"I know, I'll pay for my new car by also teaching Adult Extension Courses, like Bob and Ernie here."

'They canceled school today -- the teacher couldn't find her hand puppets.'

It could be worse -- there could be 35 teachers for every student

"There's something weird about Emily. She actually likes school!"

'Look! The new long awaited, highly anticipated but ultimately disappointing novel by that guy you like.'

'I started out as a teacher's pet, and then it kind of snowballed.'

Keeping all the balls in the air - skills

"She's a show dog...purebred, of course." "That's great! My guy's a Sanskrit scholar...wrote for the Harvard Lampoon."

"I won it for being the most noncompetitive in preschool."

A Preschool of Fish

'Yes, grammar rules do evolve over time, but making up your own to 'stay ahead of the curve' won't work in this English class!'

'Hey, I think my parents fooled me. This game is called 'Algebra Hero'.'

'Thank you for the apple Conrad. But in answer to your question, no, you may not address me as 'Boopsie'.'

"I figure I have about 20 years of school to go."

"You said mindfulness could help us do well on the test, so I filled it up with as much as I could last night."

'I can't get out! -- I lost the owner's manual!'

Spring To Do List: Teach, Testing, Testing,Test Some More. . .

'There's no delete key. You have to use the board eraser.'

'At first it's just kindergarten, but then mission creep takes over and you're in college.'

'Life isn't fair and neither is Miss Brown!'

"If you do well in your first practicum, you can move on to teaching real children."

Abacus.

Can you translate that to simple-minded!

University Book Store.

The History Teacher

"I devote most of my time to defending the bastions of culture."

"I'm doing all I can to make the little things count."

"Nice to have you all back at school, tap-tap, there are lessons to learn."

"Yes, Donald, I know you didn't expect a test today... that's why it's called a pop quiz!"

Ethics ethics.

'The frog is deceased, Mr. Graham. You don't need malpractice insurance.'

'He was very big in Vienna.'